When I was about twelve, I lost motivation entirely and in this sudden burst of sadness I went upstairs to my room and chanted “I want to die” three times. As I got off my bed the grim reaper appeared. After this I use to get nightmares and ever since I have a sense of dread whenever I go to sleep in this room but I do it so that I don’t end up completely scared all together. My questions are: What was it I saw? Also, why did I see it?

You saw your guides. No one else has access to you. Even when people have nightmares or creepy OBE's, your guides are behind it; they do this in order to teach some lesson. They are trying to communicate with you and often they must get us to a place where we are a bit depressed. People who are depressed tend to go inward for answers. When we go inward, our guides are there waiting for us. Don't be alarmed when you see strange beings in your dreams, it is one or more of your guides wearing a masks and reading from a script.